[Ultimate Guide To Self Motivation]
Most of us always try to find answers to this question “How to motivate yourself and stay motivated?”
I believe that’s what you are here for 🙂
Not just that, people from different areas of life ask it in their own versions like…
Students ask “How to motivate yourself to study?”
Teachers ask “How to motivate students?”
Fitness enthusiasts ask “How to motivate yourself to work out?”
Those who want to lose weight ask “How to motivate yourself to lose weight?”
Professionals ask “How to stay motivated at work?”
Employers ask “How to motivate employees?”
And so on…
This means people like you and I, feel that motivation is important. Therefore, you might ask yourself ‘how can I motivate myself to change my life’.
Read your favorite section:
- Why Motivation Is Important To Anyone?
- Why Motivation Sucks?
- How To Motivate Yourself To Do The Impossible?
- 1. Setting Up The Right Foundation For A Long Term Game
- 2. How To Boost Your Self Confidence To Get Through Daily Struggles Of Life?
- 3. How To Handle Failures And Setbacks To Bounce Back?
- 4. How To Handle Success To Rise Even Higher?
Why Motivation Is Important To Anyone?
It is because most of the people believe that motivation is important to maintain consistency and ultimately succeed in any endeavor of life.
It helps to increase your productivity, level of efforts and get through tough times.
It also makes your journey more fun and helps to influence others too.
But there is one major problem with motivation…
You must have faced that. It doesn’t last long.
Why Motivation Sucks?
Motivation doesn’t last and that’s why people ask “How to stay motivated?”
Motivation is like a quick sugar rush. You get that spike and feel on top of the world. And after some time..poof!!! You are back to square one.
You must have thought about how you can stay motivated throughout the day, week, month, year or your entire life.
“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” ~ Zig Ziglar
This is the mistake you and I do. Motivation is just like taking your another meal or bathing.
You need it on a regular basis. We’ll discuss it in the upcoming section in the article.
But if motivation cannot push you through then what?
More than motivation, you need a system or routine in place that can ensure that you stay motivated and get things done which are important to you.
How to keep yourself motivated?
Here are 4 steps that you can implement in your life to create a pull rather than pushing yourself.
How To Motivate Yourself To Do The Impossible?
1. Setting Up The Right Foundation For A Long Term Game
Unleash The Biggest ‘WHY’“
He who has a WHY to live can bear almost any how.” ~Fredrick Nietzsche
Remember a time, when you had to prepare for a job interview, you had a deadline to meet, or your loved one was in need.
Weren’t you super-productive at that time?
Did you need anything else to motivate you to work?
Why was it so?
Because you had a clear purpose, a Big WHY!
But we rarely create a Big WHY for our daily routine and that’s the major reason why people search for motivation from the outside. If you can give the same sense of purpose to your daily life, believe me, you are set to do wonders.
Learn how to find your purpose and passion in life, it will help you push through any kind of challenges.
How To Find The Biggest WHY?
For that you need to ask multiple “Whys” to reach the ultimate root, the big-enough reason which can drive you. That big-enough reason which is impossible for you to ignore.
It is like an onion. You peel off the layers one by one till you reach the core.
Ask at least 5 Whys.
Contemplate about it, find top 3 reasons, write it down in your journal, make it your wallpaper in your cellphone/laptop, or stick it on the wall of your room.
Keep it at a place where you can see it frequently and etch it across your mind.
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If you are able to find that one big-enough reason, it will have the ability to take you through any kind of challenge and the toughest of times.
If you really want to motivate yourself and stay motivated, you need a big enough “WHY”, because it is going to be tough, uncomfortable and painful, otherwise you might quit mid-way.
Once you have that big-enough reason, it will push you through any kind of adversity and you will succeed.
If you want to explore more about how to find your WHY, you can read this book “Find Your Why” by Simon Sinek.
Follow Your Biggest Rituals“
Rituals define us. All the results in your life come from a standard. And then you follow the standard up with rituals.” ~Tony Robbins
As discussed earlier, motivation won’t take you far but a well-set system will.
Establishing certain rituals or habits into your life will ensure that you make progress on your goals and passion.
Bryan, CEO Founder of PhCreative, shares in his article on Inc.com how some of the world’s most successful people like Steve Jobs, Tony Robbins, Oprah kick start their day with amazing morning rituals.
Rituals prepare you not for the good times but for the tough times so that you stay strong and keep moving in the direction of your vision and dreams.
Anybody can work in favorable circumstances, but when things go wrong, when the going gets tough, it is the power of your rituals which will push you through.
That’s the power of habit.
But how will you find out which habits to develop or rituals to start with?
So, I’m making this easier for you.
Here’s a simple framework you can use to identify your rituals or success habits. It is from my Amazon Best Selling Book ‘Rewire for Massive Success’.
It is called P.M.P.
P – Physical Fitness Ritual
“Take care of your body. It’s the only place you have to live.” ~Jim Rohn
You need to take care of your physical well-being because this is the only asset you have. This is one of the main ingredient for your success. There are a lot of benefits of regular exercise.
Any practice or activity which keeps you physically fit and active can be your physical fitness ritual. There could be a number of activities which you can choose from.
To name a few, these could be jogging, yoga, cycling, gym, playing sports, walking, rope skipping, etc.
Select an activity that suits you, your body, and your daily routine.
Devote at least 30-45 Mins every single day for this ritual, either morning or evening, but do it religiously.
It will not only make you physically fit and energetic, but will also increase your productivity throughout the day.
I won’t be explaining much as a lot of information is already available about it on the internet and various self help books.
I read this one book and incorporated some of the tips which I found very effective. It’s “The Athlete in You” by Kinita Kadakia Patel, an award-winning sports nutritionist who works with leading sports teams, organizations, and schools.
You can also check out her blog for more information about how nutrition plays a crucial role in maintaining your overall fitness.
M – Mental Fitness Ritual
“The mind is just like a muscle – the more you exercise it, the stronger it gets and the more it can expand.” ~Idowu Koyenikan
This ritual is about keeping your mind relaxed and calm. It is as important as your physical fitness.
Both are interlinked. If you feel physically good, your state of mind will also become better and if you’re mentally relaxed, you will feel more energy in your body.
It is a balance between the two that you need to maintain.
For this, you don’t need to do something extraordinary. You just need to spend some time with your own self during the day. If you can do that in the morning, it will be great. I’ll share some of the activities which you can try. For this, devote at least 15-20 minutes.
• Mindfulness practice
• Sitting quiet and introspect:
And when you do this exercise, journal your experiences and whatever insights you get.
I found this massive guide on how to practice mindfulness by S.J. Scott on his blog DevelopGoodHabits.com. If you want to learn more about Mindfulness Practice, you can check it out.
P – Power Booster Ritual
Or you can also call it your ‘Daily dose of motivation’.
As discussed earlier, that motivation doesn’t last long. Like you have to take your meals at regular intervals, similarly, take your dose of motivation.
Power Booster Ritual is something which gives you an instant boost. It motivates you and fills you with the energy to take on anything. It is something that touches your heart, shakes you up a bit and re-energizes you to take action.
What I used was a compilation of various talks.
For you, it could be your favorite talk, song, poem, motivational speech, some inspirational audio, story, etc.
Choose such audio to which when you listen, it goes deep in your heart and gives you goosebumps.
It thrills you and gives you hope that you can do anything you wish to do.
It must be something that helps you throw away your fears and limiting beliefs. It must give you a positive mindset.
If you try to recall, you must have listened to at least one such audio which makes you feel this way.
That one song from your childhood memories which still brings a smile on your face no matter what kind of mess you are in.
You must have heard that one story which inspires you to the highest level.
You must have listened to at least one such speaker whose speech had touched your soul and you had said, ‘Wow!’
Why wait for such tools to motivate yourself by coincidence?
Why not use them to motivate yourself each day, so that you never run out of that amazing energy?
Thoughtfully select such audio and listen to it every single day.
You can listen to it while you are working out.
Or listen to it while you travel.
Or listen to it when you wake up.
Or listen to it before you sleep.
Choose a time and listen to it at least 2-3 times a day, initially. Within 1 month, you will see the magic happening.
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2. How To Boost Your Self Confidence To Get Through Daily Struggles Of Life?
Once you are able to identify your WHY and establish some kinds of rituals or habits into your life, it becomes relatively easier to stay motivated for your goals.
In your daily life, you will face many struggles which might lower your motivation level and you don’t wish to continue.
It happens with everyone. It happens with me too, till today.
How you can overcome that?
If you’ll ask me how do I overcome that on a daily basis, then…
below are some of the practices I follow to reduce the impact of such distractions.
Declutter to Stay Laser Focused
“Don’t ever let somebody tell you, you can’t do something. Not even me. You got a dream, you gotta protect it. People can’t do somethin’ themselves, they wanna tell you, you can’t do it. If you want somethin’, go get it. Period.” ~Most famous quote from movie “The Pursuit of Happyness”
These distractions could be useless activities you do, toxic people in your life or your own limiting thoughts. Identify those distractions and remove them brutally. It will help you remain laser focused.
Removing such distractions from your life is the best way to stay focused and increase productivity.
For removing limiting thoughts and toxic people from your mind, you can do this activity.
How are you feeling right now? Observe the change you have in your energy and willpower.
Assimilate it. Let it percolate deep inside you. Keep this attitude to deal with such distractions in your life and protect your growth and dream.
Other distractions you need to remove from your life are the activities which take away your precious time on a daily basis.
For removing such activities, you need to be aware of where you spend your time. At least at the end of the day, revisit your day and make a note of activities where you spent your time.
And such distractions happen especially when you are including something new into your life.
Suppose, you are installing a new habit to jog every day. What kind of distractions can prevent your change to be sustainable and how you can protect it?
You might have distractions from your friends, you might be abstaining from waking up early in the morning due to laziness or you might be sleeping late at night because you were busy watching TV series or movies on your laptop, or had spent a lot of time on social media checking out what your friends are up to. You might be taking a very heavy meal before you sleep.
What are these?
These are nothing but the pests which will eat away the seed of change you want to sow in your life. Due to these pests, you won’t be able to continue your new habit to jog in the morning.
These distractions bring your motivation level down.
Then most of the people quit.
If you really want your change to be permanent and fruitful, you need to identify such harmful elements and ruthlessly throw them away.
These distractions happen in a moment. You just have to take care of those moments. The action you take in that particular moment will either boost your energy or drain it further. So, just take the right action in that moment.
>> When you think of hitting the snooze button in the morning to get that extra 15 minutes of sleep, choose to get up from the bed.
>> When you feel the craving to blame someone else and feel good, then take the onus on yourself, take the responsibility and move forward.
>> When you are tempted to check your smartphone to see how many likes or comments you have got on your recently uploaded pics, keep your phone away and focus on something more important.
>> When your friend asks you to eat something which is not according to the diet you have chosen for yourself, say no.
>> When someone ridicules your dreams and passion which lets you feel inferior about yourself, just ignore it and move on.
There can be a number of such moments in your daily life by which you get distracted, waste your time and energy, and move away from your path, which tends to eat away your seed of change.
It’s YOU who has to decide what to do at that moment because only you can do that. Only you have that power with you until you give that control to someone else.
Keep the Entry Barrier Low
Start small to build self-confidence, self-esteem and feel good about yourself.
It will not only help you to motivate yourself but also stay motivated every single day. There is magic in starting small.
The biggest mistake I did when I started working for my health and fitness, I expected too much.
I planned that I would wake up at 5 am and work out for 1-2 hour.
Imagine a situation, when you have not done any such thing in the past and suddenly you plan to do it.
What will happen?
You may or may not be able to do it. And when you fail, what happens?
You get demotivated and you stop doing it.
But when you keep your entry barrier very low, you start to make progress and build self-confidence gradually. So, keep it as low as possible and gradually increase the level.
It will help you to maintain continuity, motivation and your hunger for more.
For example: if you have to start a daily routine of exercise or gym, start with a small 5-10 minutes of body stretches each day for 20-30 days.
When you are able to continue that, increase the time and level of exercise you do.
You can apply this logic anywhere in your life and become better with time.
Progress Each Day To Build Momentum
Consistency is another crucial thing that you need to care about.
Make progress every single day. No matter how small it is, it will help you become better each day.
While working on my blog, it happens with me too, that on some day, I’m not able to do a lot of work due to various reasons.
Therefore, I make sure that I do something every day, even if it is a very small task like searching for a new topic for future articles, sharing my article link to Facebook groups, writing a small piece, making some changes in my blog, updating my existing article, etc.
Gustavo Razzetti, CEO @ liberationist.org, explains the power of making progress every single day in his article on The Ten Percent Advantage: How to Make Progress Every Day.
Making progress every day helps me to stay connected and look at myself with confidence. It keeps me in the game and I feel motivated to do more.
But if you break that consistency, after some days you will lose interest and you will be more likely to quit.
If you are doing a full-time job, working on your passion with a job could be a daunting task and sometimes you will not feel like doing it.
Sometimes, you might have planned for a 3 hours slot to work on your passion but you are left with just one hour because you got late or you simply wasted your time in relaxing for too long or some useless activity.
Now the choice is with you, either to waste that one hour you are left with by repenting on the two hours wasted or just get up and make some progress in that one hour.
You will come across such situations a many times, no matter whether you are working a full-time job, a student, a homemaker or a freelancer.
Whenever it happens, you need to handle it wisely.
Remember, some progress is always better than no progress at all. It helps in building momentum on a daily basis.
Look Back And Remind Yourself Why You Started
Here is how your biggest WHY helps you.
Whenever you feel low on motivation and find yourself clueless, remind yourself of your biggest WHY for which you started in the very first place.
The bigger your why will be, the easier it will be for you to overcome such phases.
Even I face such situations, then I revisit my biggest WHY and it pumps me up with new energy.
3. How To Handle Failures And Setbacks To Bounce Back?
Make Up Your Mind
Setbacks or failures should not be surprises for you.
When you start working on something, understand that you might face a failure too and that should not be a shock for you.
Make up your mind how you are going to handle your setbacks so that when it comes, it is not a surprise for you and you know how to get through this.
It is not about making a Plan B or doubting your capabilities. Sometimes, there could be circumstances due to which you might fail. But you have to decide how you are going to respond to it.
It is about understanding that even if you fail, that will be an opportunity to learn. That is how you have to make up your mind.
Be Gentle, Kind And Compassionate Towards Yourself
The first thing you do when you fail is to curse yourself. Please don’t do it.
Nobody makes an attempt to fail, everybody wants to succeed. And you too did it to succeed.
It’s fine if you failed. Be gentle to yourself. Show some compassion for yourself. Appreciate that you tried.
Take this time to revisit and find what went wrong. Learn from it, improve it and give another attempt.
4. How To Handle Success To Rise Even Higher?
When you achieve success in whatever you are doing, be grateful to whatever you believe in.
It’s easy to get carried away and become arrogant but it won’t help you. Success must bring humility, not arrogance.
Success Might Feel Different From How You Thought Of
Sometimes, success doesn’t feel the way you thought about it.
When I wrote my book ‘Rewire for Massive Success’, I had put a lot of efforts to make it best selling book on Amazon. I thought when it will happen, I’ll be happy and it will be a great achievement.
But when my book finally became Amazon Best Seller after a continuous struggle of more than one year, the feeling wasn’t the same as I expected. I felt the rush for some time but then I felt clueless.
For a couple of months, I struggled and kept asking myself “So what?”, “What next?”
It took me some time to figure out what to do next. And then I came up with this blog ‘Selfhelpiness.com’ with a much bigger vision. I also developed a new concept of Selfhelpiness Quotient so that one can look beyond IQ and EQ. (Check out your SQ if you haven’t)
Success comes with excitement and immediately leaves you in a dip if it is based on some external factor.
It’s like an amazing party night you had with friends and the next day you are in a hangover. Eventually, you will be successful in whatever you are doing but the more difficult part is when you get it, how to build on that.
And you will not be able to do that unless you have your goals beyond materialistic things. Your goals, your passion must be intrinsic.
The more you are connected to your inside, the more stable you will be.
Don’t rely on motivation by chance. Use it like bathing or having your meals.
Prepare a system or routine for yourself where it becomes your habit to stay motivated and consistently improve at whatever you are doing.
Declutter your mind and your life in order to save your time and energy, and even your money.
Start small, make progress every single day and remind yourself your biggest WHY.
Learn to handle failures as well as successes.
Be kind to yourself, show some compassion and keep getting better at your craft. No matter how small is your progress, keep doing it.
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Have a great day!
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